Shaking My Head

The Nipple Shirt

Now, before we jump to any conclusions here, let me first explain what this is and who I am referring to here.  The Nipple Shirt, as I like to call it, is an extreme version of the cut-off gym shirt.  It is cut so thin that, as you can guess, you can see the persons nipples in the front.  They really might as well not even be wearing anything.  And let me be clear with you… I am referring to males in this post.  If I wasn’t, I might have to reevaluate a few things. I haven’t seen any females with this attire, but I don’t think the guy in me would have too much of a problem with it.

If you need a visual of what the Nipple Shirt looks like in its natural environment, see the picture below. 

This picture couldn’t capture the essence of the Nipple Shirt any better if it tried.  So, lets start with the two most notable observations.  First of all, this guy is strong.  No getting around that.  He’s got some muscles, good for him.  This is very typical of the Nipple Shirt.  Second, and equally as evident, this guy is also a tool (In fairness, I do not know him, but this photo tells me all I need to know).  Not only is he wearing a shirt that’s small enough double as a paper towel, but he is flexing in the mirror and has put in on the internet for the whole world to see.  And here I thought I wasn’t going to have any good fortune today….

Now, I’m not knocking on guys – or girls, for that matter – who like wearing sleeveless shirts in the gym.  I used to wear them on occasion and still do from time to time.  They’re comfortable and cool, I get it.  But come on, man.  Do you really think that looks says anything but douche bag??  As if the staring in the mirror and creeping on women weren’t enough, you thought the shirt would make things better??  You have clearly bought into the meat head mentality, and you are following in diligently.  If nothing else, I must commend you on your loyalty and dedication.

Being that I work on a college campus, and am around undergrads on a daily basis – the pleasure is ALL mine, by the way – I see this quite frequently.  And every time I see a guy wearing the Nipple Shirt, whether it is the leader of the Meat Head Clan, or a new recruit to the fraternity, it leaves me annoyingly Shaking My Head.